Tonight I had my first date, well actually I am not sure if it was a date, but I hope it was.

And I have to tell you I was a little bit nervous, but now I am releaved, content, happy and a little bit anxious. I don't know how it went. I honestly have no clue. I mean we talked a lot, mostly I listened to her, but there was nothing that could be seen as a signal against or for a relationship. It was like sitting with a good friend.

To be honest, I think that this is not a good sign, but I don't want it to be. I like her.

It ist tough for me now. I think I want to ask her for another date, but I am not sure.

And hell I am going nuts on this.

It is not as bad as almost a year ago, I am more settled. I won't have as many worries like back then but I still will wonder some days.

But I am happy and that is the most important part. I will last from this evening some days, just because I can. It is weird but lately the boy from the old days seems to come back and takes control of the student and helps him to be more relaxed and happy.

Thank you for that, mystirious girl I had a date with.



Edit:

I think you all know that it wasn't my first date, it was my first date in 2 years. Yes it was.